A TEACHER'S DIARY : Fiolina’s dowry negotiations

When I married Fiolina a few years ago, she was just a simple village girl. Although she was the most educated from her village – she still is, thanks to me – her academic record was not remarkable.

But her people never tired to remind me that I had married a jewel, the best among them, a great wife and academician. When I got her a job as a nursery school teacher, her brother came to renegotiate the bride price, arguing that it is Fiolina’s education that helped her get a job. Besides paying bride price, in the course of our marriage, I have given more things to her people, not because of any value additions from Fiolina but mostly because of her overzealousness whenever she smells money around me.

Some people may raise a few issues with how I spent the loan I took a few weeks ago. But this is one of the loans I used very well and very wisely. But unknown to many, this was only possible because Fiolina was away.

Fiolina’s family are good to me when they know I have money, but quite different when I need money. When I called a harambee to raise funds for Fiolina’s college fees, I invited them to come. The next day, Tocla confronted me at Hitler’s.

“Tumekupa mwanamke tena tukusomeshee?” he asked loudly. This was quite embarrassing and he would not keep quiet. “Hujamaliza kulipa mahari na unataka pesa ya school fees.”

Alphayo tried to argue with him telling him that it was important that his sister is educated but Tocla would hear none of that.

“Mshahara atakula na Dre kwanini tuchange?” I only managed to silence Tocla when I bought him a drink. Later, and he was praising me, saying that I was a forward thinking and visionary man, and that that is why I had decided to take his sister for further studies abroad. But he never gave me money, nor did anyone from his family give me anything. I struggled and toiled to keep the laugh of my life in school for the two years which felt like two decades on my pocket! But as soon as Fiolina returned home early this month after her final semester, emissaries were sent that her parents wanted to see her. Her home being nearby, I allowed her to go one afternoon. When she returned she told me that her parents had invited me to their home to thank me for having taken her to college. I asked her if there was something else but she assured me that it was just that – a thanks giving.

This was the first time I was being called by her people to say thank you without demands for money. I felt proud of myself for having married a good, wise lady from such a nice, respectable and appreciative family. That was a good feeling. For obvious reasons, we slept very late that night. Being neither foolish nor clever, last Thursday, together with Alphayo and Rasto, the two men who have ably handled my marriage issues, we set out to Fiolina’s home. The day before, I had sent some money to her parents to do shopping. Never mind that the money came from what Fiolina’s chama had raised for a different purpose that I will not mention. Alphayo was in an old oversize suit that Pius had given him, plus borrowed spectacles. Alphayo referred to the suit as bigger than oversize!

Rasto was dressed in a black suit he bought upon retirement from Railways in 1998. He, however, had the shoes that I gave him last time we went to Fiolina’s place. He was to return them but never did. As for me, I was resplendent in my brand new, long-sleeved, four pocketed Kaunda suit that I bought three weeks ago when money was not a problem. . Soon we went into the main meeting and Rasto, my very able spokesperson asked for the agenda of the invite. “We are happy to see you all in good health,” said Mzee Taabu, their spokesperson. “Our daughter is taking good care of Andrea,” he said, eliciting laughter from everyone.

“We only wanted to say thank you to Andrea here for successfully paying fees for our daughter,” he said.

“Fiolina is now an educated woman, a teacher,” said Taabu. Rasto and Alphayo nodded in agreement.“Not the same girl that you people took for free several years ago,” Taabu added.