Tuesday, January 2, 2018

A TEACHER'S DIARY: Probox calmed by change of name


By Mwalimu Andrew

At the beginning of this year, I made great New Year Resolutions.

Unlike other Kenyans who write down New Year resolutions just for sharing on Bookface, I was serious about them.

Key among them was to complete and move into my house, get a baby, complete my degree, go to Mombasa and play a major role in the General Election. Among others.

The ink on the paper I had written had not dried when I went to work to ensure that I achieve them. I am happy to note that, I achieved key ones among them, and even overdid myself in some of them.

Take moving into my house for example. The work that has been done on the house is great. And the end product is so amazing that you need to visit Mwisho wa Lami to see for yourself. Every day many people come by just to admire the house. Many have taken photos standing next to the house. Some of the photos hang in their houses. I saw one who posted his photo standing in front of my house on their Bookface with the message: “Visiting my uncle in Karen”.

Regarding going to Mombasa, I was almost going taking the journey this month for my cousin’s wedding, but due to some old family differences, I was removed from the list at the last minute. I think they were afraid that I would overshadow them, and the girl, on noticing that I was better looking and better dressed and more loaded than the man she was marrying, would have easily fallen for me!

I also should have graduated from KU but you know the fundamentals haven’t changed much. The university still insists that I sit for the statistics exam, despite the fact that it won’t be of any help to me when teaching Swahili and CRE.

Of course the big achievement I made was on growing family. A week after I resolved to have a baby this year, I went to work. Even when Fiolina left home to go and teach at Sharpshooter academy, I did not give up. Every weekend, or weekdays when time allowed, I was at her house in town, pursuing my dream. It was not easy but eventually the result was there for all to see beginning in July. And after months of drama, false labour-pains, crazy cravings and all, the baby arrived a week ago, by the roadside.

It was a confidence statement in my abilities and shame to all those enemies of development who were claiming that Mr Maina, the director of Sharpshooter academy, had a hand in the pregnancy: the boy is a coloured photocopy of yours truly.

The arrival of baby Probox was great news around, and I was keen to make the best of the situation. On the day he was born, my mother and Caro stayed around, taking care of my wife. I saw them off later that night. Once they were at home, I passed by Hitler’s, where I was received with pomp and colour.

“Wewe sasa ni ndume,” said Rasto. “Na Fiolina pia ndio mwanamke kamili. Hii maneno ya wamama kwenda hospitali ni kuwaste pesa ya bure.” I took all in my stride and even claimed responsibility for having discouraged Fiolina from getting to hospital or undergoing surgery just to deliver.