By Mwalimu Andrew

I deemed it wise to visit Cate before going to university. Although Cate is my main Sim Card, this Sim has not been registered to my name. As such, I could only visit her when her parents were not around.
We settled for Friday. Cate’s father would be at the market selling chicken. There was also a major mother’s convention – during that week; an event that Cate’s mother would not miss. But there was Ritchie, Cate’s brother.

Ritchie, who is rumoured to be older than Cate, is still in secondary school. He has attended so many secondary schools, always ending his school calendar in August.

The boy is good at soccer and athletics, and as such, schools are known to sign him for football in first term, and athletics in second term, after which his contract ends. Once his season is over, Ritchie retreats to the village. You can never visit any of his sisters unless he allows you.

I woke up early Friday with plans to clean up the area around my house. During my sabbatical at St Theresa’s Girls, my father kept our compound neat – except for my house and its environs. As a result, my house is surrounded by a forest of grass.

I had just picked up the slasher to confront this forest when Saphire arrived. He asked me to follow him, and I needed no referendum to decide whether to go or not. I did not know where we were going, but I was sure we were not going for a gospel crusade.

“Nyayo leo ako na busaa tamu sana,” he announced. “Tukimbie kabla iishe.”
Nyayo’s home was full. All the usual suspects were around. With schools closed, there was also Mr Lutta, Mr Atika among other teachers.

Nyayo’s wife was busy warming the busaa as Sandra; their daughter in Class Five, served us while Nyayo collected the money. We joined the other teachers and made three orders, about which the other drinkers complained.

“Shule zikifungwa hawa walimu hutumalizia pombe mapema,” protested Rashid.
“Tangu tuition itolewe walimu hawana cha kufanya ni kukunywa tu!” added Rasto.
Cate’s brother Ritchie arrived noisily. After greeting everyone, he ordered a small Kasuku – on credit. I called Nyayo and told him to give Ritchie a full gorogoro.

Certain that he would be staying for long, I rushed home, changed, took my bicycle and left. With her parents and brother away, I would have a field day with Cate.

I passed by Hitler’s for a quick one, since Nyayo’s busaa was taking long to have an effect on me. Hitler was quite happy to see me, as all his customers had gone to Nyayo’s. For once, he filled my Pick-up to the brim!
I drank it “one-touch” and left immediately. Cate was waiting for me when I arrived and she happily served me tea and scones. Obviously, I was in no mood to take tea.

I forced a sip down my throat but when Cate walked to another room, I rushed out and poured the tea. I also hid three bikonzis under the sofa.
On returning, she was happy that I had finished a cup.

She then gave me her album, by which time I was sweating heavily. I will be lying to say that I remember well what happened after this. But, from what I was told later, I dropped the album and slept on the sofa.
Cate then dragged me to Ritchie’s house, where I slept for several hours, sweating profusely. She gave me some aspirin, believing I had a fever.

I was woken up at around 3 p.m. and staggered to the main house for lunch. Cate had prepared ugali and matumbo. I was very hungry, but dizzy. Just after swallowing a few pieces, I felt nauseated. I tried to hold it back unsuccessfully so I rushed out to vomit. It was too late.

I vomited right at the door of the house. That was a big mistake. For right then, Cate’s parents were at the gate.
Their appearance alone sobered me up, and I became aware of what was happening.

“Who is this?” Cate’s father asked. “It is Ritchie’s friend,” Cate answered, as she cleaned up the mess I had created. “Mungu wangu, mbona marafiki wa Richard wote ni walevi?” the mother lamented.

Luckily, Ritchie arrived immediately. He pushed my bicycle as he saw me off. “Makosa ulifanya tu ni kumix pompe – hiyo imekufanya toxic hivi.”

I mounted my bicycle and rode home, disappointed that I had allowed alcohol to spoil my day. I was also aware this would be the talk of the village for days. Ends

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