Uncle abandons beer as ‘his’ team whipped

Sunday, Nov 5 is a day some of your fellow drinkers at the Family Pub would like to forget the soonest.

The build-up to the match pitting Simba SC aka Wana Msimbazi aka Makolo against Young Africans SC aka Yanga aka Wana Jangwani aka Utopolo, had been so intense. The Kariakoo Derby.

Many drinkers and non-drinkers donned their favourite team’s jersey, cap and other paraphernalia, days ahead of the derby, each side boasting their team would triumph!

Makolo fans were clearly more optimistic, thanks to the rainy season. Ha!

“We’ve beaten giants like South Africa’s Kaizer Chiefs whom we subjected to a 0-3 defeat at the flooded Kwa Mkapa back in May 2021’s CAF Champions League quarter finals as it rained—you Utopolos should brace for humiliation on November 5!” argued one Baloteli, a cleaner at Family who’s the most vocal Simba “authority” there.

“Don’t bank too much on the past…in any case Kaizer Chief beat you 4-0 at their home-ground in South Africa…at Kwa Mkapa they were relaxed, not ready to suffer serious injuries in a pitch that had turned into a lake because of Simba’s witchcraft!” countered Jamal, the noisiest Utopolo at Family. He’s often thrown out by the pub manager, who happens to be a Simba fan.

Come Nov 5 and all roads led to Kwa Mkapa. Or, to bars where one could watch soccer on TV.

Simba and Yanga fans, some from upcountry, were in Dar to witness the titanic duel whose winner would get so much satisfaction as to stop bothering about the final outcome of the NBC Premier League.

Tibu, secretary of the Homeboys Cheering group in our locality was saying categorically, that his team would demolish the Utopolos. “How can we fail to beat a side that was defeated by Ihefu 2-1, of all teams?” bragged Tibu, a pub hopping teetotaler who would, at times, buy you a beer as long as you supported all his views on Simba.

Sunday, Nov 5 came and passed. Uncle Kich’s team, Simba conceded a goal, just 3 minutes into the match, thanks to Ken Msonda’s viscous header.

Yanga fans at Family went agog. Jamal, who doesn’t drink, bought Baloteli a Safari lager.

When Simba equalised in the 9th minute, thanks to a header by Kibu Dennis, Simba fans jumped high into the air, with Baloteli leading in the cheering, mocking Yanga fans who, he said, “celebrated too early.” Uncle Kich who was a bunch of nerves since the match started, started smiling again, drinking his Safari with gusto. I ordered him another beer.

To cut a long, sad story short, Uncle Kich gave up when Simba conceded the 4th goal in the 76th minute. He abandoned his third beer that was barely one third taken! He suggested we go to some other pub that would be less noisy for our beer.

“Let’s leave, my sister’s son; this place isn’t good for us!” he said as he pulled me from my plastic chair placed near the screen—the shortsighted me!