OPINION: Facebook is the new padlock for certain doors

I was wondering why a friend I knew for over forty years, had vanished ...he was no longer on WhatsApp chats.

I took it to be THE middle aged illness. Some of people of my age,( those who grew up in the era of letters and post office and radio and land line phones and face to face conversation) always distaste social media.

Some never use it.

They HAVE A MILLION EXCUSES.

Blame it on not having the huge Android phones.

What a dear cousin of mine calls “brick” phones. Huge plastic monsters.

Some say social media is time consuming. But they would be watching television programs for ages. Or stay at the pub drinking till morning. Time is a choice. We use it according to interest. So I thought this friend of mine had got tired of WhatsApp. Lately he had assumed a strange attitude. You ask him a question. Always a monosyllabic reply. Yes. No. I don’t know. I thought he was odd.

We older guys can become bonkers, sometimes. Silent body pains. Crawling diseases or general frustration. Maybe dreams we had as youngsters that never materialised. So we fall in love with silence. Become cynical and sarcastic. Or positive and philosophical. “I am not interested in noise and stresses...leave me alone!”

I thought that was the situation.

Then I checked him on Facebook. No more posts. He would send pics of him and his grand kids or friends at work. Noticed nothing posted for months, a year, two years... ...NOTHING!

Sent him a private message. No response. Jesus! Sent a message to one of his friends. Also privately. And as soon as i clicked the page of THIS friend...as Facebook always keeps names of a friend of friends...there was some kind of obituary, plus his photo and those shocking words.

The bloke I had so much laughter and fun in the 1970s, was no more. He had died a year ago. And I did not even know. But thanks to Facebook I found out.

....And it was a heart attack.

Facebook has become the New Radio. Maybe not the Radio.....The...mmmh....what?

I was searching for a music colleague. I had worked with in early 1990s, across Europe. Not heard from her for ages. I gave up calling and texting her number as there was no answer. Years went by and I thought...well....might she be dead, too? I knew she never used Facebook. Never liked any Social Media. 1960s, 1950s, 1940s, 1930s...born generation.... Ah...Aha! She had a sister.

I searched for this sibling’s name. Facebook exhibited her photograph. Smiling. Happy woman.

We were not “Facebook friends”....but then...Sent her a private message....and within days...i was back in touch with this 1990s colleague.

Facebook. The good side of Facebook.

I have so many pals paranoid about the government watching them...through social media and Facebook. Government watching you doing what? I always ask.

If you sell drugs or are planning a terrorist attack, be afraid, of course. But if you are just posting a picture of yourself with your sweetheart, at a restaurant, for your friends to see...what is the government going to do with THAT?

“Oh no, you fool...they are compiling data about our movements, what we eat, buy, use...so they can-”

Can WHAT? “Ah business...consumer companies. Control.”

Fair enough. We live in a material world. So sang, Madonna.

But if you want to hide then shut yourself in your room. Dont drive a car. Dont use taxis. Nor buses. Just walk. Walk from Nairobi to Mbeya to Rabat to Mexico to Helsinki to Maputo.

Please.

Please.

Listen.

I had not heard from Ahmed Idarous, my Arusha born big brother. Ahmed used to be called Shariff. He was classy. Shariff was a linguist and we shared a love for languages. Languages are key, to true communication. We had last spoken in Dar es Salaam around 1980. Then he had gone to France and beyond. By the time he got back, I was somewhere in Latin America. Years passed the internet brought emails and we caught up on and it well, it ended in Facebook. Now he was a grandfather.

Suddenly ....I don’t hear from him.

So recently, I am goin through his Facebook page...and well...there are pictures of him being sick. Flown to India. And well.... Sad news. Shariff was a unique guy! RIP.

Facebook still keeps his page though.

This week I just heard someone I knew passed away. Last time I spoke to her was 2017. There were some brief messages on Instagram in 2018. But she was not keen on sharing her phone. And boom. How did she die? Where do i go? Facebook again. Her page is still on. Last picture posted in November 2018...

Same story.

Facebook.

The library and secret informer. If you don’t know someone’s family. If you are just public “friends”- Facebook keeps the chain, the padlock.