OPINION: His rage was a puzzling as what made him angry

We were rushing to a boxing match to support a friend who trained at our local gym. We were all into fitness and boxing and keeping fit. This was also a treat for James Mbaga (made up name) - just turned fifty. Yes, it was his Big One. Yup. Every dog has its day, goes the old English proverb.

“Mimi Mzee sasa,” James declared in Swahili, meaning; now I am an old man.

We calmed him down.

“Age is just a number!”

“You are as old as you feel!”

Small Sam, the tiny cousin of Birthday Boy James shook his head and ..well, . Sam was also a boxer although he had retired after badly injuring another amateur pugilist. As we matched from the bus stop to the East London fighting club, I reflected on the term Mzee.

I remember when I used to see older folks as the Lucky Ones. They got the best meals. Better houses. We said Shikamoo to them. Offered them chairs and bigger tables. At least in Africa.

Question.

Is being old, still honourable, in 2019?

In Europe you offer a sit to an older person because they are unwell, and they might fall unconscious and choke and collapse, perhaps die. It is not funny writing this. Few years back I was once chided by an elderly black lady who wanted my seat in a London bus. I was happily rooted and she staggered in, stared sternly at me, hoping I would stand up. But I was busy watching the passing buildings and metropolitan scenery.

“Young man!”

Everyone looked as I seemed startled.

I did not budge.

“Young man, respect, please.”

Well, I thought. Avoid a confrontation. London can be a very volatile city. She took the seat.

“Thank you,” she sighed. “Wait till you are my age and you will learn to...”

“How old are you Ma’am?”

“You are so rude. But if you must know. Just turned 58.”

I did not want to tell her I was actually older by at least two years.

That is the trouble of not looking your age; I was later chastised , by these same mates, I was with right now; strolling to a boxing match.

The tournament was brilliant. No winner. A draw. No blood. So the two sportsmen hugged and smiled at the end despite bloodied and swollen lips, eyes and cheeks.

Later we were at the restaurant eating and celebrating and Brother Mbaga was getting tipsy.

“James is not well; he has been down lately,” Small Sam whispered when birthday boy stepped outside for a cigarette. Since 2007, it is illegal to smoke indoors in public buildings.

“Something happened?”

Everyone looked at me.

“You did not know? Didn’t he tell you?”

So they narrated the story.

James Mbaga was ambling through one of the many beautiful London parks. A sunny afternoon. He saw two women, reclining, chatting. One was well covered but the other had her breasts practically sticking out.

James Manga being James Manga, hot blooded African, what did he do?

He stared and almost stumbled. Next moment the woman turned lioness.

WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT? YOU DONT KNOW TITS? NEVER SEEN BREASTS BEFORE?

James quoted a Swahili saying: The Eyes Have No Curtains... and apparently, as the verbal exchange jogged on.... He decided to walk away...

Now, three weeks after, he was still enraged.

As Small Sam narrated the incident, James Mbaga returned from his smoking.

I immediately asked: “How come you never told me, man?”

Well, this set him off like an Iraqi bomb.

It was his birthday but still he rumbled and rattled:

“What are we doing in this life eh? When we were growing up it was normal to stare at women. These days you stare ...they call you a rapist. I do not understand.

I have always said, and I should have told those ladies, beware of men who do not stare. Those who hide their intentions, they are the dangerous sort. But to flaunt your private parts in public and not expect us healthy heterosexual dudes to look? What is the world becoming? ...Eh? Tell me... I am so fed up with this feminisation of society. Of males being made to stare on the floor and treated like wimps and little kids...while women complain there are no more real men these days. We should not listen to them. No wonder factories are making sex robots. What kind of world are my sons going to be living in, eh? You think the beneficiaries are my daughters? I doubt it. Both males and females of the future are in trouble...hey, guys why are you looking at me like that? You think I am crazy?”

WE told him he was alright.

Laughed. Then sang Happy Birthday.