How ivory tower demands demolish relationships

According to Wikipedia, these terrorising submarines sunk about 3,675 merchant vessels and warships in the Atlantic Ocean, and thousands died.

Oss Guinness in his book The Gravedigger File mentioned a lieutenant colonel in the French Secret Service who used to tell a story from World War II.

When the German U-boat threat was at its height, the U.S. Defense Department made every effort to find a solution.

One scientist recommended boiling the Atlantic Ocean until the submarines rose to the surface.

His leader warned all staff, “strategies have to be practical. The impractical ones, however imaginative are not wanted.”

In marriage, the following can be like ivory towers.

Thinking we perfectly understand our spouse's needs: Most marriages begin with high-packed romantic intensity, but the majority of people enter marriage with a very superficial understanding of their spouse's needs.

Unfortunately, it's our partner's less important needs that get most of our attention.

Unless we get a more objective third party (counselor) we are prone to seriously disappointing each other.

Thinking honeymoon excitement will be maintained: During honeymoon, all you do is have time to show your love to each other.

But life is not static, after returning home new responsibilities begin to surface, eg cooking, cleaning, laundry, working outside home etc.

Before we go further, children are born, bringing amazing attention, competition and other nurturing demands.

However, though the honeymoon ecstasy has faded, a couple can experience deeper love when they become intentional about their relationship.

But thinking our relationships will all the time operate on intense emotional pleasure is not realistic.

Thinking our spouses will be the same as us: Demanding sameness is lunatic behaviour.

The idea of thinking that we should be the same, thinking and feeling the same or doing the same thing should be avoided.

Our Creator, God, didn't use a cookie cutter to make us, having the same content, same taste, and same size.

No! We're all different.

So expecting our partners to think and act like us will make us disappointed and disillusioned.

It's practically impossible.

Moreover, demanding sameness in a partner destroys individuality and creates bondage.

It hampers growth.

I don't think anyone wants to marry a clone of oneself. It would be the strangest thing to happen on earth.

Variety makes the world a thrilling place to be.

Thinking we're perfect mind-readers: The danger of mind-reading games is that we can be altogether wrong.

It's vainglorious.

Lastly, one of the things that impair marital satisfaction significantly is unrealistic demands popping in again and again, especially after the honeymoon.

Let's avoid disillusionment.

Overly-high demands create bondage, breaking relationships.