Before posting your child’s face online
Mariam* is over the moon that her firstborn daughter Naima* is to report at school for the first time. She is as excited as any other parent could be. Naima’s toothless smiley face will be splashed on her social media wall and likes and comments will for a week be flowing from friends and relatives.
This may appear innocent but remember that she might have provided a kidnapper on prowl for children with exact names, place and school.
She has also probably and unknowingly lured a predator hacker to “doctor” the image for paedophile websites in other parts of the world. For example, and according to Australian Children’s e-safety Commissioners, one child pornography site had images of unsuspecting 45 million children.
Besides, it has been suggested that 50 percent of images shared on paedophile sites have been taken from parents’ social media sites. We lose full control of where our children’s photos end up when we share them online.
Naima is not alone. Many parents cannot wait to take photos of their little ones especially now that high resolution mobile handsets are vogue – the baby’s first faltering walk, cheeky behaviour, angelic faces smudged with food, birthdays and the list is endless.
However, specialists have raised red flags about uncontrolled pasting of children’s pictures on social media.
“Some of the main concerns relate to identity theft (privacy risks), digital harvesting of children’s images on predator sites (cyber-safety risks), sharing personal information about your child that should remain private (psychosocial risks), and revealing embarrassing information that may be misappropriated by others (psychological risks),” researcher and author of Raising Your Child in a Digital World’, Dr Kirsty Goodwin, wrote on her blog.
The act of posting pictures of your children online is known as sharenting and, like social media itself, it has its pros and cons. Benefits include being able to easily share moments and updates with family and friends, particularly those who live far away.
According to Charles Nduku, a psychologist based in Dar es Salaam, we are living in an era where we are constantly competing with one another and while we might post anything we choose to, it is not a good idea to post our children’s photos on the social media.
“African parents consider their children their property and whenever we post pictures on social media, we take no consideration of their rights to privacy. Children may not like what was posted when they were young. This could eventually adversely impact on their self-esteem,” Nduku says. He adds: “Children can’t do that on their own. So, every time their face goes online without their consent, there is the implied assumption they don’t have a personality worth protecting. Instead, the thinking seems to go, they’re just babies, doing baby stuff.
In any case, one does not know the intention of the viewers,” he said.
But is it advisable to post children’s images on social media networks?
Nduku says that personal information must remain just that – personal. Too much exposure on social media leaves children vulnerable to a host of other unforeseen problems and risks.
One should be able to control what goes on their social media. There should be a limit as to what we post on the social media.
There are two facts to consider, one, is the amount of information that you give away, which might include things like date of birth, place of birth, the child’s full name, or tagging of any photographs with a geographical location – anything that could be used by somebody who wanted to steal your child’s identity.” he added.
Why sharenting may not be good
Human beings are social. The allure to showcase personal developments including cars, children, personal achievements and other earthly belongings on the social media is overwhelming. Sharing your child’s birthday or first day at school on social media network has become many parents’ pastime.
Human beings want to stay connected with their friends and relatives, and more often than not, they do not leave their children out of it.
As soon as you post the photos of children, you will realize that people love photos of new babies, so it’s not surprising that within a couple of hours, they will have amassed tens of likes, as well as multiple comments.
According to Bonventura Balige, a sociologist, human beings have an urge to show off their achievements or to be appreciated by others including their children.
He he adds that as soon as we post the photos, we lose track and control of where such photos end up. Cautioning parents to be pragmatic when posting these photos.
“With social media, there is a notion of a brand. Everyone is a brand these days, even kids. They are the future brand. So you have to be really careful about protecting that brand and what images you are putting out there, “ says Balige.
US reality TV star, Kim Kardashian is worried her daughter will become a victim of cyber-bullying. Being a reality TV star, she is dreading the day North sets up a social media account because she fears she’ll receive lots of online abuse.
She has spoken of her fears that her children will be bullied on social media.It’s a sentiment echoed by many parenting experts.
“I would really hate for the day my daughter has to get on social media because the comments, are like cyber bullying. Sometimes they can be so negative. They can be really uplifting too, that’s why sometimes I need motivation to work out or ask for a different hair colour, they can be super positive, but it does suck when they are negative,” Kardashian was quoted by the media.
“As a parent, you really need to be thinking of what message you are sending to your child by putting a picture of them up on social media,” she further said.
The internet can open a world of connectivity and learning for young people, but to help them have enjoyable online experiences, it is critical that you are attuned to any signs of cyberbullying.
Most experts agree on the fact that posting children’s pictures poses psychological, sociological and security issues and are raising red flags to the fact that while we may need to archive events and pictures for the purpose of memories, there is a need to be cautious.
Salvatory Kessy agrees with the other experts that since not all people have good intentions, one needs to be very careful when posting their children’s photos on social media.
“People can use the posted pictures for bad intentions, for instance their children’s pictures can be used in child pornography. Social media posts might be used for bullying.
You should also be concerned about how others may react to the stuff you share about your child on social media.
Whether your child cares about old photos and stories about them on social media, others may be able to use that information to make fun of, insult, and even bully your child as he or she grows older.
For school-going ages with access to social media, cyber bullying may happen where children bully one another online. This has negative impact on the psychology of the children and could easily affect their studies,” he added.
He adds that messaging could impact your child’s future. It’s difficult, if not impossible, to control information once it’s posted online.
“One can’t prevent anyone from taking a screenshot of your post and disseminating it beyond your reach. Your deleted posts, while apparently gone from your social media profile, may still live on in Internet archive websites and on the social media servers themselves. Your Social media posts might cause hate crime. This happens if the parent of a child is hated, then people will also hate their children and this can cause psychological challenges such as depression or suicide to the children” he said.
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