Nose picking: What to do about it

Although some people consider it a “nervous habit” — a category that includes thumb sucking, nail biting, hair twisting, and tooth grinding — nose picking isn’t necessarily a sign that your child is overly anxious.

Kids usually pick their nose because it has something in it that doesn’t feel right.

The most zealous nose pickers tend to be children with allergies, because the heavy flow of mucus and its subsequent crusting give them a “something’s up there” feeling that makes it difficult to leave their nose alone. Certain environmental conditions also make kids more likely to pick; if your heating or air-conditioning system is drying out your child’s nasal passages, for instance, he’s more likely to have a nose-picking problem.

What to do about nose picking

Nose picking would be completely harmless except for one thing: germs. Germs on the fingers can lead to small skin infections inside the nose, and fingers that have been in a nose are a great way to spread colds and flu. Remedying dehydration or congestion is the surest way to stop nose picking; meanwhile, teaching your child to use a handkerchief or tissue instead of his fingers may be the easiest way to deal with it. In addition, try these tactics:

Address his allergies. He’s at the age now when he’s gotten past the constant colds of preschool, so a stuffy nose is probably the result of allergies. The most common allergens affecting children are dust mites, animal dander, pollen, and molds. see tips on reducing the allergy symptoms that can lead to nose picking.

Keep him hydrated. If you live in a dry climate or if heating or air-conditioning seems to be drying out your child’s nasal passages, offer himlots of fluids during the day, or try a humidifier in his bedroom at night. If he’ll stand for it, a saline (not decongestant) nasal spray may also help.

Encourage him to wash his hands. No child is going to want to wash his hands all the time, but explain to him that washing them a few times a day and keeping his nails trimmed so that dirt doesn’t build up behind them will help keep him from getting sick.

Teach him to use a handkerchief. Whether you give him a cloth handkerchief to carry in his pocket or keep him supplied with packets of tissues, encourage him to blow his nose occasionally and then wipe out his nostrils with a hankie in private. This solves the germ problem and will stand him in good stead in social situations.

Let him get silly. Tell him that if he must use his finger that it’s best done in private. This may lead to some jokes or giggles about grossing people out with flagrant public nose picking. So much the better — if he can guffaw about it with you he’ll have an easier time remembering what to do (and not to do) around other people.

Bite your tongue. While you can remind your grade-schooler that nose picking is unhealthy and impolite, nagging or punishing him when he picks his nose won’t help. If he picks his nose unconsciously and decides he wants to break the habit, putting adhesive bandages on his fingers to make them harder to slip into his nostrils may help, since it allows him to catch himself in the act. But you’ll probably want to do it only when he comes home from school so he doesn’t have to answer embarrassing questions from his friends.

Keep his hands busy. “Sometimes a child who picks his nose just needs to do something with his hands,” says Janis Keyser, a parenting educator and co-author of the book Becoming the Parent You Want to Be. She suggests looking at whether your child has enough down time, or whether he’s spending an inordinate amount of time in passive activities, such as watching television. “We’ve moved children away from fine motor tasks, but as a species we have a need to work with our hands,” says Keyser. Younger grade-schoolers love making big craft projects (glue, beads, feathers, decorative paper scraps, markers, construction paper, glitter), solving jigsaw puzzles, sculpting with clay, learning how to cook, and putting together simple models or building sets.

Check things out. If your child’s exploring his nose so intensely that he’s drawing blood, or if the habit seems to be one of a constellation of nervous behaviors (he’s still sucking his thumb, picking his nose until it bleeds, andhaving trouble sleeping, for example), consult his pediatrician or a children’s therapist. It could be a sign of anxiety or other emotional problem that he needs help with.

Ignore it. If you’ve done all of the above and your child still picks his nose occasionally, your best bet is to keep his fingernails short and snag-free — and to do your best to ignore the picking.

Learn about all the things that could cause a stuffy or runny nose in a grade-schooler.

The good news is that unlike nail biting, nose picking is a habit your child is unlikely to continue into adulthood. Most children eventually give it up on their own, either because they lose interest or because other kids tease them enough to make them want to stop.

What to do about nose picking

Bite your tongue. No matter how embarrassed you are by this habit (and of course you are embarrassed), don’t say anything. Nagging or punishing your child when she picks her nose won’t help, because she probably doesn’t even realize she’s doing it. Techniques such as putting elastic bandages on her fingers will seem like unjust punishment to a 2-year-old for something so innocuous. (Once your child decides she wants to break the habit, though, this technique may help, since it allows her to catch herself in the act.) Plus, as is often the case with 2-year-olds, pressuring her to stop may trigger a power struggle. The more she realizes that this behavior gets to you, the more pleasure she’ll take in it.

Keep her fingers occupied. If you can identify times and places when your child is particularly likely to pick — while watching television, for example, or in the car — try giving her a substitute (a rubber ball to squeeze, a fuzzy fake rabbit’s foot to stroke, or finger puppets to play with). Teaching her to blow her nose may also help.

Check things out. If your child’s exploring her nose so intensely that she’s drawing blood, or if the habit seems to be one of a constellation of nervous behaviors (she’s sucking her thumb, picking her nose until it bleeds, andhaving trouble sleeping, for example), you’ll probably want to consult her pediatrician.

Wait and hope. As your child gets older and uses her hands for more complex tasks like building Lego castles and mixing mud pies, chances are her fingers will stay away from her nose of their own accord. If not, and she keeps up the nose picking until she goes off to preschool or elementary school, at some point some other child will say, “Ewww, she’s picking her nose,” and she’ll suddenly be very motivated to stop. At that point you can work on ending the habit together with a system of secret reminders. Until then, just keep her hands busy — and your fingers crossed.