I called it quits because she was overly jealous

Sunday December 3 2017


By Eugene Mugisha

        I do not know if what she had could be called jealousy, but if it was, then she was super jealous. She gave a new meaning to the word, redefined it in ways that one would never have thought possible.

And in all this, she maintained that there was nothing wrong she was doing, she was merely being protective of her interests. Which was true, yes, but only it just was not the thing to make a relationship grow and thrive.

I met her through a friend who at first refused to give me her number. I pestered the man to introduce me to her for a while before he finally relented.

Even as he gave me her number, he told me that she was a bit ‘weird’. Instead of asking about this strange remark, I quoted for him that famous phrase about one man’s meat being another man’s poison.

High level of possessiveness

And for extra measure, I even told him that he should keep his opinions to himself because I was a very open minded fella who likes making his own judgments about people.

But even before we started dating, I started noticing a high level of possessiveness, but hey, I was a man who wanted this girl to like me so I welcomed whatever attention I could get from her.

Every friend I introduced her to, male or female, asked me what was up with the girl; “she seems a bit strange, the way she watches everyone who talks to you”, they said. But I laughed about it and told them she was in love, and love does strange things to people.

Then we started dating properly and things quickly escalated. Now that we were accountable to each other, I had no right to privacy; of any sort. Well she also told me everything she did and who she talked to. She even took me through her entire phonebook explaining who each person was to her.

I did not need this level of disclosure but if she wanted to tell me, that was fine with me. So, we would meet or talk nearly every day and I had to tell her in minute detail everything I did and everyone I met. If there was something she did not understand, she asked me to explain.

It then became boring

It seemed quite charming at the start but I soon grew tired of it, especially when I started noticing that she did not like me telling her I met some friends and we had a good time.

She would frown as if fun was something I was supposed to have only with her. Then when I would tell her I met a new person, a girl, she would insist on me repeating the whole conversation to her. It became tiring.

So I started making up lies about what I had done during the day. But then she started insisting we meet every evening after work.

Hanging out with her was tricky business because she tended to ignore every other person present; to her it was just her and me.

She was visibly aggressive to other girls, even friends that I had known before I met her. I told her to take it easy, but she said she did not trust any woman - or man- with her man. “The men too?” I asked her.

She said the men help me to get other girls. I took a moment to think about the future of our relationship and its sustainability. But I did not have to think long because a friend - a girl - called me right then and asked me why “my girlfriend was harassing her”. “What do you mean by harassing you,” I asked.

“She called me and told me to stop throwing myself at you. At first I thought she was joking then I realised she was dead serious. Tell her to stay away from me,” she told me before hanging up.

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