“They cheat. They manipulate. They’re now the CEOs of situationships.”
The women are hardly silent.
“Men disappoint us.”
“We became the providers we thought we’d marry.”
“Wanataka kulelewa.” “They don’t court us anymore. Hakuna kubembeleza. Hakuna convincing. They just want to ‘know you’… biblically.”
But maybe the real problem isn’t the opposite gender.
Maybe it’s the mirror.
Because toxic behaviour didn’t wake up one morning and choose only men or only women.
Some women have turned emotional manipulation into a love language. Silent treatment becomes communication. Impossible standards become “bare minimum". And somehow, if he really loves you, he’s expected to read minds without Wi-Fi.
Meanwhile, some men have made inconsistency a full-time career. They chase you like they’re running the Olympics, then disappear the second you reply with enthusiasm. Friday they’re planning forever. By Monday they’re “not ready for commitment".
Then there’s accountability, now officially an endangered species.
Everybody wants loyalty. Not everybody is loyal.
Everybody demands honesty. Until the truth hurts.
Everybody wants peace.
Yet some people carry enough drama to qualify for their own reality show.
At this point, Cupid deserves paid leave, therapy and a career change.
Everyone has evidence.
Everyone has screenshots.
Everyone has trauma.
Almost nobody has emotional maturity.
The funniest part? Every side is convinced they’re the last good people left on Earth.
Men swear women spend more time in lounges than living rooms. Women say men now want princess treatment too.
They want surprise gifts. Good morning texts. To be spoilt. To be chased.
So… who exactly is the princess here?
Let’s also give credit where it’s due.
The economy entered every relationship uninvited.
Rent is expensive. Food is expensive. Fuel is expensive.
Peace of mind? Luxury item.
Women are working harder because Prince Charming doesn’t pay bills.
Men are under pressure because society still expects them to provide even when inflation is body-slamming every paycheque.
Everyone is tired. Everyone is stressed. And occasionally we’re projecting that exhaustion onto each other.
Then we make sweeping conclusions.
“I dated two toxic women. Therefore, all women…”
“I met three irresponsible men. Therefore all men…”
By that logic, one delayed daladala means public transport should be cancelled forever.
Here’s the truth.
Some women are toxic.
Some men are toxic.
Some women are amazing.
Some men are amazing.
Maybe the mirror deserves more attention than the microphone.
Because before asking, “What’s wrong with men?” or “What’s wrong with women?” Perhaps the better question is
