A CHAT FROM LONDON: Media mocks the Rolling Stones; reason? They’re old!

Last week, one of London’s major tabloids published a couple of photographs from a private Rolling Stones birthday party. I do not really understand English humour sometimes (regardless of my 20 years of living here), but what I gathered was mockery.

Before we continue I do not know how many East African readers have been following the careers of two of British greatest bands.

Number one are The Beatles, whose music continues to glow. This month the country has been celebrating 50 years since the release of historic 1967 album Sergeant Pepper Lonely Hearts Band, considered the “best of all time”....

While The Beatles are no more (two of their members have died, one in 1980 and the other in 2001), The Rolling Stones carry on performing, releasing CDs and celebrating birthdays. The name “Rolling Stones” stems from a song by African American blues musician Muddy Waters (Like a Rolling Stone, 1950), with a line going thus: “Rolling stone gathers no moss...”

The Stones, as the group is generally known, played a crucial role in promoting this genre of black people’s art. Guitarist Keith Richards especially always did some work with African American bluesmen, including the late BB King who passed away last year. Singer Mick Jagger (pictured), the band leader and frontman, was always photographed around Jamaican reggae musicians such as Peter Tosh. This was when reggae was less known and not so globally popular.

For us in Africa, Rolling Stones were not as celebrated as The Beatles. Their most well liked song used to be I Can’t Get No Satisfaction.

I remember one of my youngest brothers trying to sing it when it played endlessly on Radio Tanzania during the mid-1960s.

PESILOO…

He couldn’t say “I can’t get no…!”

That was how we tried mimicking Wazungu songs.

Recorded in 1965, Satisfaction is in my opinion Rolling Stones’ most loved tune.

Now to examine the said images.

Starting with “Birthday Boy” Ron Wood, who is 70 years old. Ron Wood is also guitarist for the Stones and here he is gliding with a 39-year-old, loving wife Sally. The caption mocks: “Prop me up: Ronnie needs a helping hand from Sally...”

Close inspection of the image just shows the couple are holding each other’s shoulders. The word “helping hand” is meant to give the idea fact that Ron cannot walk on his own, obviously as a result of his uzee (Kiswahili for old age).

That if you are 70, walking is like trotting up a mountain. Why would this woman marry him? In fact, the two just had new born twins. Ron Wood has six children in total, some grown up, of course.

Is it sinful that a man is robust and happily living his life with a loving younger female and family?

Next is Keith Richards, aged 73; similarly, arm in arm beside 61-year-old darling wife Patti. Caption moans: “Richards is let out by wife Patti...”

Same implication, a 73-year-old man cannot quite walk on his own.

Is he in crutches? No. Walking stick? No. Limping? Picture shows nothing of the sort.

Finally is bass player, Bill Wyman, 80, “accompanied by wife Suzanne”...she is 47.

Overall headline of the birthday party story, sings “Its only crock n roll” – Youngest Stone is 70- And now they all need support acts...”

If you did not know these guys you would think they are wrecks. But in fact they keep on working, playing music and doing fantastic gigs. If they were that rubbish, how come great, grandfather, Mick Jagger was knighted and is now Sir Michael Jagger, highest honour dished in English culture?

I have read reports where the photo caption adds all their ages and came to two hundred and something years figure.

Why can’t the old be given a place in the community? These guys are survivors for God-sake! How many bands from 1964 are still around, or having loving birthday parties, across the planet?

It is a very strange way of reporting working men in their old age. The impression I get is that some people are suggesting that when you become old, you should not work, party, marry and have children. Just sit, cry, take tablets, pee on yourself, die, be gone. Old age is such a catastrophe. Youth is celebrated and no wonder you see famous individuals in the Western world spending loads of money on plastic surgery to cut out sagging parts of the body, uplift limbs, wrinkles on faces, and so on...

Culturally, I find it appalling. Whereas in Africa the elderly are considered wise, respectable, and treated with awe, our kith in the northern hemisphere equate uzee with the negative. Wazee get hammered, mistreated by nurses in hospitals and enduring committed stars as you can see by the media.

No wonder expressions like shikamoo and marahaba hardly exist in other languages, especially European.